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What do you think? Should I tell her? I know she won't like it, and it is scary.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> yes it is scary. but you're not in therapy to protect your T are you?

you're in therapy to deal with your issues, your stuff, your work, whatever it is you call the work you do in therapy..........you go for YOU, not for her, not for hubby or family but for you.

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but I want her to confirm that I would have been wrong, and that she wouldn't have actually been relieved that she didn't have to bother with me anymore. I want to be reassured that she really does care about me. And I also want to confess that ever since then, when I drive over the mountains on the way to and from seeing her, the thought of having an "accident" keeps popping up even though that isn't something that I want to do now.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> sounds like you're clear on what it is you want from her.

now on to the more challenging aspect....how to tell her such

you've identified your wants, now how are you going to go about getting those wants/needs met? and what are the plans if things don't go as you want above?

that's the kind of thing we'd be looking at.....how to tell, contingency plans for how to cope if response wasn't what we wanted/expected, etc.

good luck Rap. you've certainly been dedicated to your process and it is showing in your posts over time. hope you're able to see your growth too.