I can't use the phone and I have tried some chat options in the past and from what I have understood is that these places don't care and I am not sure how they would help me except to tell me to not kill myself. That is my problem which makes me depressed is that I can't seem to do basic social necessities that people take for granted. It makes me feel like this giant wuss because I just can't seem to get the courage to do anything. I try and make myself feel stupid every time and it overall discourages/humiliates me. Humiliation coming from every time I try to talk to someone about my problem they give me the common reply of why don't I just go out and do it.

People metaphorically spitting in my face.

I should be perfectly fine and able to do stuff. I just gotta do it. At least that is what everyone tells me with their all encompassing knowledge of mental health issues. It's basically like going to a guy with no legs and telling them to walk. I mean he probably could walk but he would still need the right equipment first but even then he would still look weird walking because it isn't natural for the guy with no legs to walk. Yet they do have people walking with those metal legs-

I wasn't planning on killing myself right now.