My fiance and I used to share primary doctors. We soon realized that it wasn't healthy for any of us. The doctor started judging me for how my mental health issues were affecting my fiance. But my fiance told me to not tell our doctor about his anger issues and how he was abusive with me. I started to receive really poor treatment from the doctor, my fiance noticed and it bothered him, so we both left that doctor and found our own.

I can't imagine ever sharing a T with my fiance. My T works in an office with other Ts, but she won't even left my fiance see one of those Ts. She said that I need to feel safe and secure not only with her, but also the surroundings. I need to know that I'm safe with the other Ts since they know nothing about me.

Maybe you can make clear to your T that sharing the same T with your H will affect and possibly hinder your relationship with both your T and your H?