I read the door slamming post also. I dont think its about the money. It might be easier for you to focus on the money, or to switch ts, but i think that just postpones solving the pain, solving the real issue.

Your other thread reminds me of me and my t a lot, like when he says he WANTS to buy me a birthday present (but never actually does) or when he offered to give me a ride home from the hospital - i refused it, but he emphasized how he WANTED to give me a ride. Its hard for me to accept even his saying that.

A gf texted me yesterday (i wrote about it somewheres on pc) just asking how i was feeling, and it gave me a minor panic attack. I am not used to people caring about me; I am used to people demanding something from me. I feel like i am moving in slow motion with her. I cant reason myself out of my panic attack. All i could do was be honest and non-accusatory with her. I think that is all your t is asking of you - as parents nowadays tell their little kids, "Use your words!" - that just gets to me, for some reason. But that IS exactly what we are trying to do in t - put words to feelings hitherto undescribed and therefore unprocessed, unintegrated.

Eta - it doesnt make sense to have bad feelings about somebody trying to be nice to us. But we do. We can say its the other persons fault, but this is getting to be one big effing coincidence that we ALL have this problem! KWIM?