I don't look at my T whenever I have something difficult to say. I allow it to be a signal between us that this is hard for me. For example, this can happen at the beginning of a session when I am just getting back into "therapy mode" and we have exchanged pleasantries and I am trying to get started on the difficult stuff. I start saying the hard stuff with eyes downcast. I look him in the eyes when I am ready to engage with him authentically and wholeheartedly. It shows I am not scared of our connection. Where my eyes are in the room is another way I communicate to him my feelings.