Thank you for your reply, SnakeCharmer,

I saw my T today and she is helping me prioritize these concerns. (My mind is so unfocused.). We talked about transplant and VAD criteria today and I read her part of the article I quoted here. She thought it would be better for me to ask my cardiologist what is the specific criteria at the transplant hospital where he has privledges. (Genius)

Also, like your suggestion, she thinks now is the time to build my support system. I am lacking in that area. I need to reconnect with my general cardiologist for support, rapport and information.
I need to find other support, as well...responsible neighbors, church?, friends? Visiting nurse?

My anxiety is all over the place. ( I think I may have already mentioned that). It's like, I may experience sudden death...so let's get the advanced directives taken care of....I'm trying to prepare for possible surgery if I decompensate, so let's do what we can...but right now I appear stable, I haven't been shocked yet...what's for lunch? My mind doesn't know what to focus on so I am trying to prepare for everything! Gah! After a while, I can't function at that high level of anxiety...so I'm big on denial, too. I play my illness down to my family and act as normal as I can around them. It won't help to make them worry, too. So, yes, the majority of the time I am like you and have to let all that worry go.

Thank you so much for your information, advice and support. You have been really helpful, and I know you "get it."

Regards,
Pre