Look, a guilty person always tries the offense first. I worked in ER and one night I went into a room and there laid a young man with the crap beaten out of him........I mean he had been stomped and kicked.

So.........I said, "what happened to you?" Well, you should have heard the story of "I was just sitting in my LR and these strangers burst in and dragged me outside and beat me like this".........my reply was, "oh, you don't mean your drug deal went bad, do you?"...........And I told a doctor that just once I'd like to hear a guilty person admit it. Be up front, instead of lying and putting off on everyone except themselves. He said it will never happen. Cops tell me that also.

Your husband did something wrong. You didn't. Confront him and get counseling. Kick him to the curb if he doesn't want to do better. I've been there and should have left years before I did. I lost a good part of my "young" middle age hanging on..........And I left with NO self-esteem or confidence. He had me so convinced that he was pure........and that it was me........(he was cheating with much younger women)