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I was scapegoated, too, and I struggle with a similar problem. I can't be alone, but I'll stay in relationships even if I'm not happy in them. I gave up trying to figure it out or entertain "why" thoughts, because the conflicting thoughts made me feel uncomfortable anxiety and depression, which I don't need more of. Anyways, I think it's both an attachment and self-esteem issue. I feel a security if I am in a relationship and if I get broken up with or break up with someone, I feel this kind of dive...like something in my brain dropped. It's weird.
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