Change does not come about when I am intent on changing. It comes about when I can accept myself as is, have compassion for why I am where I am emotionally, allowing myself to be, to exist...Thinking that I need to change makes me feel like damaged goods, which somehow ties in with self-hatred....acceptance of myself leads to healthier choices in the future....
I don't respond well to the notion, 'I have to change'...maybe cuz of my history of a n overly-controlling parent....