In my experience of grief, for example, I spent a long time trying my best to avoid it, then control it because I was scared of how painful it might be.

In the end, I simply stopped fighting, allowed myself to feel it and was completely blown away by the fact that, as soon as I felt it, it changed. It just changed into acceptance, then other emotions flooded in but at a rate I could accept, feel and allow to heal.

It was just a case of 'feel it to heal it.'

Hope that's some help.