If you're actively attracted to boys, then you can't be gay - that would make you bisexual at the most. but if you're not actively attracted to the same sex then you're probably bicurious or bisensual. By which case I mean, men fulfil your main romantic/sexual attraction (or will do, once you're older) but you're not against trying things with women. Would that be a less frightening level of sexuality for you?

I really don't think that anyone can OCD themselves into being gay, I don't think you need to worry.