I was recently diagnosed with DID and PTSD and really had no idea though it makes sense in hind sight. When I first discovered alters in therapy; first I felt it was me against them; a lot of them are children who are very manipulative. Now I feel more of a "we." And a need to protect and nurture. The children anyway. The thought of integration makes me feel hopeful but also scared. I don't want to abandon these children. They dont like it either. I also don't want to stay shattered. I would like to be whole....whoever "I" am. The host?? Eeesh. This is so new and overwhelming.