My therapist tells me how hard it is to connect with her because of all my walls or defense mechanisms. She says:

I use feelings of helplessness to deny that I do have the ability to feel my emotions.
I project my emotions of women onto her, causing a lot of conflict and distrust.
And I sit on the fence a lot such as me saying, " I want to feel my emotions...but I can't. "I think you're right, but I feel I am right."

She believes these defense mechanisms are keeping me from feeling my emotions. They help me avoid my raw emotions. I believe she is right but I cannot see it. It makes sense to me but I can't fully see what she is seeing. These filters are so hard to get past.

Does anyone know how to break down these defenses in my own free time??

Help!