Quote:
Originally Posted by Kimaya
Definitely. My worst triggered depression came from the comment of someone who is a family member that made me feel all of those things. I still feel it. I felt isolated, and apart, and helpless to defend myself to the unknown judgments I had earned.
edit - my transient paranoia has always been bad though... oddly somehow this time caught me off guard because of the makeup of the group. I don't think my paranoia could get any worse without becoming the psychotic type - for me it was like it made it feel as though what everyone was saying would be true and it was useless to fight.
|
It's difficult not to feel victimized. Especially if one has been a victim as a child. The worst part for me was that at times I had no one on my side (especially the abuse I endured as a child).
But, I did notice, that in most cases, if I looked carefully, I could find little hints that others knew what was going on and acknowledged it... they didn't fight for me, necessarily, but at least I knew the judgement in question wasn't something that literally "everyone" believed about me.
And, also, I noticed it isn't something that happens to just me. I see the same types of behavior happen, but with someone else as the target. I don't like it. and I look for ways to let the target know that not everyone is in agreement.