I'm sorry you woke up feeling this way. I know what you mean. Of course on a wider perspective, you are of the world, you are a living thing like any other. Here you are, and it's not always easy to deal with. I couldn't always get what I needed either, and sometimes I would just try to soothe myself by daydreaming elaborately for a long time about what I want. Even though I still don't have all those things/situations, it soothed me for the moment and was a relief. When you're in dire straits as you are, it's good to come up with something, anything, to start moving in another direction. I hear you.