She needs to move out. I have no idea how you make that happen, but you can't support your mother at 22 years old when you are just starting college. It is wrong for her to expect that of you. Extremely wrong.

I would google 'out of the fog.' It's another forum for people who dealing with family members that have personality disorders. I don't know if your mother has one, but you'll find a lot of people who are in similar tough places, dealing with parents that are not taking care of themselves.

You are not cold or mean for wanting to live your own life and have a normal mother/daughter relationship.