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Originally Posted by Frankbtl
Hi TJ, well done on not letting the triggers beat you ( yet again!!  ) !!!!! 
And the starting to spot and act on the early onsets is going to be making a massive difference in getting through/managing them and your feelings. I know it might not work all the time, but.......... excellent!!!
And the rest/support set up sounds really positive too.........but perhaps see the help out there as there as a tool in staying on track as much as you can, in helping you to keep on developing those coping resources, as giving you that backup in keeping on top of your wellbeing, and in helping you in finding/experiencing really significant things in your life............all that kind of stuff .............. instead of as much there to prevent x or y from happening, because you're not well enough to go it alone, because you can't do x or y.
Let that help be there to empower you, to help you feel empowered..............instead of much more a reminder of..............because there is so much more to you TJ, so much you don't always give yourself credit for!! 
And you know if times are hard.........which they may be at times........you're not going to be on your own, perhaps keep reminding yourself of that as often as you need to, hey??  |
You amongst others have been a massive support to me in this thread/chronicle of my experiences, and without it I don't know if I'd have managed quite as well. Wanted to say that before continuing.
There is a certain amount of fear in me as (and I think I read it right) I know I am still not well... but I have support and the two months of safety in hospital has weathered a storm that I doubt I would have done alone had I not been admitted.
With respect to empowerment... yes, I see the validity in that... I just have to be brave to embrace it... to not let stubborn pride (which is really weakness of rejection for me when I truly scratch past the surface) stop me from reaching out... as much for me as for those that I care about as it has been a burden on them and I can't put them through it again.
I am scared though Alison... there are days, hours, minutes that I do 'give up' and I desperately just want to grit my teeth through it to get to the other side.
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And the writing down your feelings bit doesn't just have to be focused on home visits, do you reckon?? If you feel that you might be coming close to crisis at any time then do you think you could be writing as much as you can down for if you need to phone the crisis team. I know that might be really hard but it might help to be reading (on the phone) what's been going on for you, rather than having to try and explain when you're already feeling.............????
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This is something to genuinely consider and speak to the team and my cpn about... to ask them to put in notes that on contact I may be detached and reading out what I've written... and to bare with me if I start crying or whatever
For this I will finish at the bottom:
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Originally Posted by regretful
Best wishes to you for Thursday!
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Originally Posted by Idiot17
Good Luck TJ.
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Originally Posted by lilypup
Good luck...you can do it!
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Thank you to all quoted above, to all who have posted in this thread... to those who have silently read but have supported in your own way... it has meant a lot to me.
This has been a rocky road to this point... I really didn't know this thread would go to so many pages at the first post... hell, I thought I'd be in hospital for a few day... a week max.
There are probably going to be a few more entries from me from here till Thursday but yes, the day of discharge is looming and hopefully it will be less rocky once I'm back home.
Just wanted to add a
and another thanks.
TJ
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Independent Mental Health Advocate (IMHA): UK