I have no advice about calling your Dad on his birthday, except to do whatever feels best for you.

But I can tell you what to do about bill collectors calling you about your dad's (or anyone else's) debts. I learned this from first-hand experience. Dozens of calls a week on a former neighbor who had repeatedly put me down as a contact person without my knowledge or permission.

1. Very politely ask the collector's name and who they are working for. You won't get their real name, but ask anyway. Write it down and date it.

2. Tell them, again very politely, that they are calling the wrong number, you are not the person responsible for the debt, the debtor does not live with you and you do not want them to call you again. They will try to engage you in conversation. Say, "Please do not call me again. Thank you. I'm hanging up now." They will keep talking. Gently hang up the phone.

3. Do this for each debt collector, if there is more than one coming after your dad. Document it all.

4. If someone from the same agency calls again, tell them again they have the wrong number, you are not the person they are seeking, the debtor does not live with you, that you already told them on X date to not call you again. Then say that if they call you again, you will report them to your state's attorney general's office. Do not engage in conversation, no matter what ploy they use. Gently hang up the phone.

5. If they call again, repeat the above and tell them you are reporting them to the state attorney general. Say good-bye and hang up.

6. It's unlikely they will call again, but if they do, go to your attorney general's website and you will probably find an on-line form where you can report the repeated calls. Make your complaint as concisely as possible.

Bill collectors get paid a low salary, but they can make good money by persistently going after debtors, getting a commission on each debt collected and bonuses for doing an especially good job. They will keep calling you and bugging you as long as you seem helpful to them in any way.

It's amazing how many people will pay off somebody else's debt in order to stop the calls. All the debt collector cares about is collecting the debt, it doesn't matter to them who pays it. If you shout at them or hang up, it only riles up their competitive spirit. They are used to being shouted at and cussed out and having whistled blown in their ear. They're also used to being lied to, so don't lie, don't evade, don't answer any questions. Stick to saying they have the wrong number, you are not the person responsible for the debt, and so on. Don't prolong the conversation. Do not be helpful. Do not be rude. That's what they want because that's how they get info and get people to agree to pay. That is their job.

You can make them stop (usually) by using the above procedure. All the calls to me stopped within two weeks. They don't want to waste time on a complete dead end. So your job is to make yourself a dead end for them. Good luck. If you can get these calls to stop you may find resentment levels dropping dramatically.