Took me more than 20 years to accept the BP Dx, the PSTD that was easier and much more disabling at the time. I convinced myself that all my problems were only PSTD despite the evidence to the contrary. My last therapist kept saying yes you are BP, but I refused to see a Pdoc until it all fell apart, then and only then did I consent to medications.....I wish I would have capitulated much sooner.