A lot of places (in the usa, not weird web places) sell prozac for like $4 a month. Psych meds dont have to be outrageous.

I would look into self-sabotage (like google it). It sounds like you do not have a supportive family, and you are worried the t will withdraw his support "before you get a chance". Believe me, that is transference talking - that is how your family treated you, that is how you expect the world to treat you. It is NOT how a halfway decent t works.