Quote:
Originally Posted by bipolar gemini
so i've had hypomania but not a truly manic session for fours years now..which should be good right??? but for the past four years i've been mostly in a depression and i am starting to wonder if i can ever get the good quantities that go along with mania back. i want to feel self-deserving again, to feel that i can spend money on myself, to be confident...but that's not who i am anymore, at least at this moment. will i ever feel those things again? or will it always be just so-so?
mania isn't great but i've been depressed for so long, anything sounds better right now.
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I completely relate to this right now. I've been mostly depressed for a year and eight months with some random hypomania, and desperately miss how I feel when hypomanic. I always thought that was "normal" until learning I had BP. Supposedly Lamictal will help elevate me out of the depression and give me enough energy without going manic. We'll see. My manias were horrible so I wouldn't want to go there. Pdoc wrote the rx incorrectly so now I have to wait til Monday to start it. -_-;