Quote:
Originally Posted by feralkittymom
Both what she's said and what you've deduced. It sounds like you're reading behavior, rather than simply speculating from thin air. I would be uncomfortable with a T who has on-going struggles that are "leaking" into the therapy. For me it adds a layer of complexity to a process that is already complex enough without.
When you notice her animation around certain topics I think that is telling. I've never wanted a true "blank slate" T, but that sort of animation feels more emotionally invested than I would want around an issue.
I admit that I have firm beliefs about this sort of issue and others may not be so concerned. I never wanted a T that had struggled with my same issues. I certainly wanted a T who was well-trained, and that includes a substantial therapy experience. When a T has that sort of experience, it should lead to self-awareness. Everyone has struggles; the only difference is that some glide through life unaware of them, or act them out. Personal therapy would address both. I don't need, nor draw security or comfort from, any matching of struggles. I don't believe the appearance of a matching struggle equals greater therapeutic understanding. But it does create the possibility of a lesser therapeutic experience if the T is not both well-skilled and well-healed. So for me there would be risk with no reward.
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Well this really sucks. There's a lot I really like about this T, and I have been to so many T's already. I'm bpd, so finding a new T is going to suck, and I move in like a year assuming my education moves forward. I wish there was some way to work this out with this T. Maybe I'm wrong about what I think I know??? I really wish my brain would not spend time thinking about things like this. I do feel like I have been making progress in therapy, but this is hard.