It's like a cruel game life plays on us. I have suffered since I was a teen and have been treated for twenty years. When I am in it I think it will never end. When I am doing real good I feel like I made it all up and that it won't come back. Or at least I get hopes that maybe it won't come back. I know it will though. I have had many many episodes. Traditionally 3 or 4 a year that only last 3 or 4 weeks. In recent years it has gotten more long lasting, like 6 or 8 months. Now I am on a med that had has worked great for 5 months but I can feel it creeping back. I have no idea what the future will look like as far as depression goes. At least it used to be predictable. I am 50 and don't know if aging has made it worse or not.

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