I'm not in a great place right now either but I will most definitely hold your hand.

It sounds like you've had a lot of extra worry lately with all the tests and things. You have all this on your plate plus you manage to work and go to therapy to work on your emotional healing. That is not an easy task and I hope you can allow yourself to see that as an achievement.
It's easy to get bogged down with all the things that are or might go wrong and the next thing you know, you feel like you're in a huge black hole. Can you try to just take each day as it comes right now? Try working out what would help you to feel comforted and just be really gentle with yourself?