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Old Aug 18, 2014, 04:21 AM
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Ford Puma Ford Puma is offline
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Member Since: May 2014
Location: Ireland
Posts: 4,392
Quote:
Originally Posted by glitterrosez89 View Post
I established goals for myself at my first appointment yesterday. One thing that concerns me is that I sort of got the impression that the therapist thought I could just go stick to these daily goals now that I have them. The thing is, it's not like creating to-do lists isn't something I have tried before. My hope is that knowing someone else is keeping me accountable will help motivate me to actually stick to what I said I'll do, but it's honestly really hard for me to just go do something...I have a hard time concentrating a lot of the time, so I just give up and spend four hours in bed crying before I try to be productive again. It's a hard cycle to break. I can't do it overnight.

I'm worried that if I don't show up to my next appointment (in 3 wks) reporting that I'm accomplishing so much, he's just going to be like, "Well, if you don't want to change, then I can't help you." I want to change. I really am not just a lazy person. I'm very depressed and have concentration issues that make it easier said than done, though. Just deciding to radically change my habits and behaviors isn't enough to make me transform into a whole new person.
I have been thinking a lot about this over the last week. Next week could be my last with T and right now I am just totally livid with her.
Had she just came right out with it when I first meet her and told me she did not know how to help at lest I would have gone to someone else. 24 or so appointments in 4 years and now all I am is angry.
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