I am so sorry for what happened to you. I can understand why you would be hesitant. It is important to be checked out however. As you get older the periodic gynocologist visit is just part of being a woman.

Normally they insert a speculum into your vagina so that they can see the walls and look for abnormalities. It may hurt a little when the speculum is inserted but usually they are very gentle and compassionate. While it sounds horrible, it is not really as bad as it sounds,

Mostly I hope everything will turn out ok. I know that you are feeling apprehensive but it is better you do it rather than deal with possible complications later