So my grandpa is 85 and he had to have emergency surgery yesterday on his colon. The surgery took 3 1/2 hours and the surgeon said it went really well and his vitals were good all through surgery. He is now in the icu, and he had a rough night last night. They kept him intubaited to protect his airway. He was awake, but very medicated. They found that he has fluid around one of his lungs, and his heart rate is now very high and is not coming down, so they said if it doesnt come down soon that they may have to shock him to try to get it back into a good rhythm. They also now think that he might of had a heart attack recently or even possibly during the surgery or last night. They are not sure.

The thing is, is that I am not feeling any emotion. I should be sad, but I cant cry. I mean my grandpa is fighting for his life, and I have no emotion towards it. I do feel sad, but cannot express it. I feel like there is something wrong with me. I should be showing some emotion. I wish I could go see him, but he is 11 hours away from where I am. I will keep praying because that is all I can do right now. I meet with my pdoc today so I am going to ask him about why I am not feeling any emotion.

Does anyone else have the problem about not being able to feel emotions in situations where you should?