I get like that in situations including previous jobs and i have bpd. It seems so real and ive always believed i was right but noe after reading your post im starting to doubt my self. A past social worker of mine did say that people with bpd see things differently than how others do. Maybe a week off work would help you figure things out and if you have a t then discuss it with them. Its not that we imagine it but we read deaply into things and jump to the worse conclusion. Do you like going to the gym? It releases endorphines and makes you feel happy and good about your self.