If this is mainly about her not paying so much attention to you as you needed, maybe you should remember, not just what she went through when your parents were getting divorced, but what she for you before.

There must be a lot of good memories. Sometimes we focus much more on the dark side than on the bright side. You felt abandoned and you still feel that way, but maybe your mother felt her world falling apart at that time. She could have lost control of many things.

Remember the good times and don't let this distract you from your goals.