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Originally Posted by redbandit
I've recently been officially diagnosed, or at least am finally admitting it. I'm feeling extremely hopeless about my illness and chances of getting better . Can anyone give me any tips? I'm seeing my pdoc tomorrow . I feel like I've sabotaged any chance of happiness I may have had . I'm sure things will get better eventually, but a pdoc I talked to said it can take 5-10 years to get better from bpd! ! Seriously? Please someone tell me this isn't true
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Sorry that you're going through a tough and confusing time right now
I'm gonna be straight with you, for your benefit.
I've known about BPD for 3 years, and have had it for about 13 years (if you don't count childhood), so I'll speak solely from my experience.
"Getting better" is a loosely defined term
Does that mean you're on cloud 9 ? Or that you're married ? Or that you're divorced ? It means different things to different people, so my first tip to you is: Don't put too much emphasis on the "get better in 5-10 years" crap. It really doesn't work that way.
Since BPD represents a long standing presence of self-defeating behavior patterns, it is a deeply rooted problem. That means 2 things - 1) meds don't cure BPD, though they might help with symptoms. 2) The problem cannot be fixed overnight, simply because it took many years to form those behavior patterns, so it will take time to undo them. How long just depends on you entirely ... a few years is doable, but then, it could be a few decades (sorry to break it to you).
Also, although the DSM defines recovery from BPD as no longer matching 5 or more criteria, does that mean you suddenly jump from total agony to total bliss overnight ? No !!! There is going to be a continuum of *gradual* change for you on the way to recovery.
The bottom line is: You need to find ways to cope with your troublesome symptoms, whatever they might be: emotional outbursts, social anxiety, whatever. Over time, you will feel better ... not because you have been "cured" or have "recovered", but because you have found ways to cope with your symptoms and avoid your self-defeating behaviors. How long it takes is entirely up to you. .... AND ONE PROVEN THERAPY OPTION FOR THIS IS DBT.
One example from my life: Road rage used to be a huge problem for me. I'd do very dangerous things in response to people driving like morons. Ultimately, I realized that it's just not worth it, and started reminding myself to breathe deeply when triggered on the road, and just change lanes and let the asshole pass.
Don't let the doctors or the seemingly bleak prognosis get you down. You can and will get better ... just want to get better. We are here to hold your hand along the way
Feel free to PM me with any questions.