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Originally Posted by bluedonna92
Thanks for the comments! My brother used to play at nursing homes actually, but there's no telling if he enjoyed playing for such audiences. He slowly stopped doing that, I guess because it requires regular contact with the nursing home administrators, since the gigs weren't regular. I know he loves to play piano and perform, so it'd be great if he could do that again.
I don't know if he'd be miserable in an office. Maybe it would be too interactive for him, but I can't see a lot of other jobs in sight, and really hope he doesn't get stuck at CVS or stop and shop for his entire life... At least in an office he could fix computers and have hopes of promotion, and maybe increase his social skills.
I did think that an enforced schedule could help, but as he gets older, the ability of anyone to enforce anything in him is less and less. My dad can't even get him to do chores around the house. The only thing that got him motivated was when his computer was taken away until he could get a job (he was unemployed for around 2 years and living at home after college). That may be the only thing that will get him going this time... though all it did last time was get him a job at Stop n Shop
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I doubt an office job would work unless it is in a very specific field like computer programming where there are likely other people who are similar. The only thing I could suggest would be enacting a schedule like you've said along with the expectation that it be followed. Perhaps even a demand like a small amount of rent or asking him to contribute money towards groceries could motivate him to work. Your parents can provide the basics but if he has specific food requests, maybe he has to pay for those himself or no one buys them. I think it's important that your parents help your brother understand that he can not run the household, and that as a member of the household he needs to be an active contributor. My daughter is younger but I see the same issue with motivation or just even caring about anything. We did notice that when expectations are clear and there are immediate consequences that consistent, she is surprisingly responsive. Her teachers handle her with kid gloves regarding school work, even though she's intelligent. I've asked them to make sure she knows she is expected to finish her work (even if its a little different from everyone else's) and she should get the same consequence as everyone else if she doesn't. It is the first year that she has shown any motivation at all to complete her homework - as in rushing to get it done in the morning before school if she didn't the night before. So it is possible, its just a lot of work. If he really only has mild Asperger's, then his ability to learn certain concepts may be higher than your family thinks, it just takes longer and needs a different approach than it would for you.