That actually sounds a lot like social anxiety and perfectionism. If it's bothering you, then talking to your T will help.

I can relate a lot to that because I have SAD, although since getting my self-esteem back to a somewhat stable level, I've become a lot better. Around 2 years ago, it was really hard for me to go to events where I didn't know anyone. Now, it's easier. I think what helped me was a mix of CBT and DBT.