Jan,
Sometimes the biggest 'hurts' happen because of the responses from the people we 'love (family).
Sometimes it's not worth trying to change them.
You can help stop the 'vicious cycle' by taking a 'step back' from all the emotion surrounding what you've talked about. Perhaps making a mental note of what you can and can't change. Be quietly firm about it and maintain your self-pride.
Some people behave poorly, maybe not because of something you've done or said, but maybe something else that they are unable to manage in their lives.
If people see that you are unaffected by their unjustified (?) behaviours towards you, they lose the 'power' of effect on you and hopefully 'back-off'.
Hope your mum stays well. That is important to you.
Carry on making your life what you want it to be and cherish the harmonious contact with the ones you love (e.g. mum).
If you've done nothing 'wrong', keep your chin up and enjoy the good things in your life.