I had a really hard session today. My therapist kept saying things that made me mad, but she really wasn't saying them to make me mad and had no clue that I would be angry at what she said. I tried really hard to express what has been going on in my present day life and what kinds of memories that recent events have triggered. But I couldn't say the words, I didn't want to say the words. I am really afraid of talking about some things that happened to me as a teenager and that I actively participated in as a young adult. Well, the session was about to end and the words just popped out of my mouth. There wasn't even time to explain what I was talking about. My therapist was really calm and said that she wished she had more time, but she didn't and she helped me with a visualization to put the information away for now. She said that she hated ending this way because we will not see each other next week. I will be away for 8 days. But, she commented that I seemed like I was just raw. And that was how I would describe myself. I feel like all of my nerve endings are exposed. I have crazy anxiety. I want to be okay for my family. I hate the way I left things for myself. I kind of wish I had not gone to therapy today. Ugh.