It is not because they want to keep me as an adjunct. Every other person on a nine-month contract had previously been an adjunct, and many are moving into the permanent positions.

Age and sex discrimination may be involved. Plus, I happened to observe that the emperor had no clothes regarding those issues, and that was when my ship started to sink.

I think that I just don't know how to get along with people. My Emotional Intelligence score isn't so very low, but I can be abrasive and defensive.

Every post menopausal woman who has kindly listened to my story including my T, and one male who is an x- college administrator in another country, say discrimination as soon as I start to internalize this as "my fault."

I can see this intellectually but my internal feelings are that I am "not good enough."

My financial situation is serious. Fear overwhelms me, and my lack of self-esteem paralyzes me.