Hi, clairekelly66, and welcome to Psych Central! In my mind, I see this as what's called an "emotional affair," which can be almost as bad, if not worse in a way, than a physical one. And he was keeping it from you.

I think if I were in your shoes, then I would ask him to move out--and give the situation some time. But I certainly wouldn't trust his lying behind again.

I am sorry this situation happened. Please keep us informed. We do have the "divorce and separation" subforum here, if it comes to that.

My thoughts, anyway.