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Originally Posted by UKgal
Am sure this sort of thing has been covered, but I'm brand new on here.
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Welcome to the site, UKgal.
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One day I saw his FB open & couldn't resist a sneak peak.....their messages came across as flirty to me & she even put at the start ''I don't normally fall for married guys''
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In my experience, if there is NOT 100% honesty and respect in a marriage, you really don't have a marriage at all. It's just a "friends with benefits" arrangement where the guy feels
FREE to "shop around".
I'd have a marriage counselor help both of you to restore the respect and trust that might have been there in the beginning. If not have a counselor TEACH both of you how to be honest and respectful with each other.
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I don't understand where my jealousy/lack of trust has come from.
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It usually comes from early childhood situations (parenting) that have programmed you to be insecure and mistrustful which then promotes fearful, angry and jealous feelings later in life whenever you are triggered = UNLESS something happens to help you acquire better self esteem and confidence thus undoing your earlier conditioning to feel insecure and JEALOUS.
I'd google: self respect and get to work on improving yours.
Good luck building up your own self worth and then standing up to your husband's bad behavior,
jim
