If your depression come first then it would stand to reason that loss of identity is one of your symptoms of depression. That is a starting place. How long does your depression last? Is it a moodswing or has it been around awhile? It sounded like moodswings to me because you said most of the time you are fine and happy but then you swing down into the scary lost place. I have all sorts of advice for moodswings that I love giving because every time I give it I am more likely to be able to remember it when the time comes. Ha ha. I have a terrible time following my own advice.
Carrie

<font color=blue>The important thing is this: to be able at any momeent to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.--Charles Du Bos