Ah, it's not her fault. We've never broached the topic of an emergency plan - all the times I have talked about suicide I have been clear I know it is my responsibility to get myself to hospital if it ever gets that bad. Wary of talking too much about it with her I suppose because it was after I'd been banging on about ideation for a while that she lost it at me ages ago and we had the rupture (which is fixed now) and recently she has told me pretty frankly she thinks I will kill myself if I move home or will spend my life trying. So it;s old news. The thing is with suicide, you have to want to not do it for yourself, nobody else can get rid of the urge for you can they.