I hadn't realized, really hadn't.

My doc just informed me that, after 30 years of a depression dx, a likley dx of Aspergers, then a recent dx of bipolar ,that suddenly he suspects "something else going on" and that being borderline. he cut my antidepressant--which brought me out of a full on mixed state--and helped me feel better than I have in YEARS--to almost zero. This is bewildering as hell for me. I feel for you, i really do, but after going out of my way to please these people, to suddently be told I just have this terrible personality...has left me really wondering how I should respond. its almost like they gave up on helping my depression, or maybe the insurance company is pressuring them to save them a few bucks worth of medication and just say my whole problem is that I'm just some unlikeable
windbag. i suddenly understand why they are suddenly asking about my family;s background of addiction. Guilty by association, no doubt. Makes me sorta sorry I asked for help. No, wait it doesn't, but I need the antidepressant...not the stigma.

i wish you well. it sucks.