I'm sorry you are going through this. I know how crappy it is to feel extremely unwell in front of children.
With the support of my therapist I have built the support group around me. Basically there was only I and my husband taking care of or two small children. Then with the support I realised that I need a team that can help when I'm having anger attacks. Now I have two of my neighbours that I can ask to take kids over for few hours if I have something coming up. I actually haven't told them I'm bipolar, I'm afraid they would be afraid of me, I lye something like I have a terrible migraine on something.
Also as a mom I have realised how much I need planned breaks, so I do schedule with my husband times off, taking a walk, going shopping, going to swimming pool etc. I need this often, at least 3-4 times a week for an hour.
At times when kids spoil food or toilet paper etc. I try to calm myself down actually counting how much does a single toilet paper cost, or a cup of peas or something and then realise that it's way lot cheaper than most of their toys, so that makes me calm down.
I have that kind of shaky week feeling sometimes when I have not eaten enough. Something sweet calms that down soon.
Hope this never repeats for you!