I, umm, told my mother on Thursday night about what I am working on in therapy at the moment.
I don't know what I was expecting.
I had decided not to tell her at all
As I couldn't stand the thought of her (expected) reaction
Which wouldn't have been bad, probably more smothering than anything
Thank goodness I live over 1000km from her!
Sure, I was my usual 'cheery' self, acting as tho nothing at all was wrong in my life
And talking to her in a very roundabout way
She normally remembers the tiniest detail of almost everything
But can't even remember the dress I was wearing
Let alone how I was around the time
Sure, I can appreciate that she was going thru a totally rough time then as it was when my father was really sick and being diagnosed with bipolar
But I guess that her reaction (or lack? of reaction) is not what I was expecting
I thought there would have been lots of questions; lots of txts to see how I was; my mother freaking out about it all
But nothing- except agreement to my guess that she was going to spend the weekend looking thru the photo albumns to find a pic of me in 'that' dress
I don't know what I wanted from her
Nothing really, maybe some answers which I know she hasn't got
So I am no further forward
And now I have told her- this is where my anxieties really kick in as I already have major trust issues with her- and i don't know who will be told now...