Calista+12, I never really imagined a mental health group would be so judgemental and downright ignorant. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. Stigma is alive and well....

Yeah, same here. I mean, I thought it was weird that I was the only person who was a self harmer in a physical way, in the first place. Kind of makes me feel more isolated.

Yoda, I can appreciate your compassion; and I would expect that others who want them to have compassion on their situation would be the same. And they joked about feeling sorry for the girl and they made her seem so pathetic and I was just boiling inside. I felt like my heartbeat was coming out of my chest.

Addressing your response: I'm not really sure why people self harm; I can't speak for everyone. Most times I self harm out of frustration (i.e. I cut myself to avoid stabbing someone else). I also know that i've done it for control purposes (2nd most common reason), a few times out of boredom, and then (when I started in the beginning) because I felt so empty and dead and needed to just be able to feel something (and that feeling is not always achieved).

I don't want help; and i'm not crying out for it. T's asked me if I wanted to stop and I told her no. She accepted that answer and has never pressured me to feel any other way.

The story of the girl was interesting and well, I honestly can not fully understand her story either. I do get some parts of it, more than I care to relay in this message, but I can see why it would be especially a turn off to people who do not self harm. My scars are hidden, though I'm trying to become less shameful of them because they are a part of me and I shouldn't have to consider every position I sit in, or every way I place my leg/wrist just to appease other people. With the exception of two people and T, no one else knows about it and i've been back doing it for over a year.

All in all, I think its very much okay not to understand self harm - but I don't understand (and maybe that's something I need to work on) how people who struggle one way can't empathize with people who struggle in another. It seems that in no one cares to respect anyone else on a basic human level anymore.