Thanks for the support I have actually attempted journalling again, too, after years of "diary silence". It's great to hear how others are coping with feeling alone or under-appreciated. Nina Simone, you might be onto something there - I sometimes think that I view my friends differently than other people do. Even if I don't talk to them for years I still feel just as close to them when we eventually get back in touch. In a way this is good, because I care about people for a long time and keep friends others lose, but I might give them too big a place in my heart compared to how they feel about me.

You had plenty of good advice in your post, it is a good thing that you are becoming more active on these boards Personally I think journalling and blogging may work for me, aswell as truly considering who my friends are and if we value each other equally. When it comes to religion, though, I chose to abstain - it is a choice I made long ago, and now it just feels all wrong and hypocritical to me. I respect and sometimes even envy those who can believe in God or other "supernatural forces", but I simply can't. Even if I wanted to. It is something I am comfortable with and something which encourages me to make the best out of life, as I truly believe it is all we have, a blink of the moment in the history of the world. This is different for everyone, I assume, so it is still good advice for those who do feel connected to a religious force Good luck to you in your endeavours! Using september to focus on YOU is an awesome plan. We should all do that.

And to kaliope: I appreciate your support and insight, but I don't really believe the problem here lies in me not liking my own company - because I do. Sometimes I even prefer being by myself reading or watching a TV show, drinking wine, instead of going out but I feel like I have to because I don't want to miss an opportunity to be with the people I care about. I read, I write, I watch TV shows and movies, I love music - there are plenty of things for me to by myself, so that's not really the issue. I'm not bored when I'm alone - I'm just LONELY, regardless of how entertained I am. If that makes any sense.

I think the main problem is that I have no one to CONFIDE in. Such as, today I had a huge fight with my sister, and she claimed something about our mom that really shocked me to the core and disturbed me deeply. I was meeting one of my best friends, the only one I really can confide in, later today, so I told her the generals of it. But, before we have time to discuss it further other friends show up, or her boyfriend. and so forth. THAT's really the problem, that I don't really feel like I have time to talk about issues bothering me, to confide in someone, because they are all so busy and I don't want to bother them by demanding we meet alone etc.