Quote:
Originally Posted by Leah123
Oh, and I'd be quietly resistant to my T also if I were as ambivilent about her as I feel after reading the guilt about the money and the changing boundaries!!! For her to go from a lot of contact all the time it sounded like to a lot more traditional/constraining once a week thing... is that how it is? Because that would make me feel resistant in a very healthy, self-protective way.
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Yes, that's how we roll nowadays. Admittedly it is hard, but I am trying to be positive and sensible about it, because this is how it probably should have been right from the start, isn't it.
Yesterday, I got a response to my slightly hysterical voicemail/ jumbled text sent at the weekend. It was a nice, caring response, saying she was glad the hospital were good to me, etc and her weekends are pretty much off limits now and she doesn't check messages. This is a bit different to what I'd thought (I thought crisis was an ok time to get in touch) and it just hit me about her unavailability. So for maybe half an hour I was choked with pain, but then I was able to make it alright for myself - because I realized that I need to be able to focus on what she can offer, and not what she can't. I think.