Hmm maybe I misunderstood Teacake but I feel more like yeah the name is not important, what is important is the symptoms and how to cope with them. Definitely think that PTSD exists, whether or not that is my issue I don't know. What I do know is that something that happened to me 7 years ago makes my life hell today and I just want that to get better. I don't want my past to control me anymore. I am glad to know I'm welcome here though. Posting this made me extremely anxious, not just due to recalling those experiences and all the fear and anxiety that goes along with it but also because I'm somewhat terrified of interacting with people. Even with this being a community specifically for mental illness there is an intense fear of judgement and rejection. Thanks for your kindness.