Thanks everyone for the bday wishes.

Newtus you have so much ahead of you. You're the perfect age.

Well I had fun. I got some really cute shirts. One with Marilyn Monroe on it. I got flowers from my sister Heather, beautiful cream roses with lavender lilacs.

We went out to dinner at my favorite Chinese restaurant. My sister Kim didn't join us. She really triggers me. I invited her but she said she had to work late, which isn't true she gets to make her own schedule. She really irritates me though so I think she was trying to be nice by staying away. I didn't have much family there. It was just my son, and 2 sisters and me. Right now I just don't feel comfortable around my nephews. Their all doing so great in life, just makes me feel like a loser. And they don't know I have bp. They just know I don't work anymore and I've gained weight. I would tell them but they don't really talk, they're really non emotional like my sister Kim.

Just everything's changed. It will be ok though.

Tomorrow I'm going to do a whole bunch of psychological testing to see if I qualify for temporary welfare basically. It's only $160 a month but better than I get now.

Then my sister Mickey is taking me to get my hair cut and highlighted. The crafting is probably gonna have to wait. I love my sister Mickey so much though. She really tries to understand. She has a great heart. I can't wait to get my hair done! It needs to be cut so bad!

Everybody in bed?