I skimmed over some of that cos it was long but I honestly think there is nothing wrong with you, You sound like a person who knows what they want and that is good. I also find flirting annoying for the most part, it's generally fake and pathetic. And the thing is you are right about most men who flirt with you wanting only sex- the reason isn't "all men are bad" or any of that crap it's just the way the mass population is conditioned as you obviously know from things you said yourself. I say good on you for having your eye's open to these things. The problem is with society (and media portrayals) and you will get a lot of sht for the way you are but that doesn't mean you are wrong. Just look through history and you will see a lot of people who were right that were vilified either by the state/country or just by thier families/those around them. What you are as far as I can tell is an individual, someone who doesn't follow the crowd. I say good on you. There is nothing wrong with wanting to talk normally and get to know people, it just sounds to me like you want more real things than fake- substance and you are a bit more serious than some people. So? It's ok, you are fine. Some people are flirty, some are funny and some are just serious or more real. All are fine. Maybe it is the social pressure that "follower" type people put on you making you feel bad when you shouldn't? I have had issue's about the things you are talking about too cos I am not really flirty, not girly and even wear "guy" type clothes. The older I get the more I realise it is not my problem it is other people's problem and societies problem for being too stereotypical. People don't fit into neat little boxes of boy/girl, etc gender is only a made up thing really. Look at a wolf or something for example, can you tell it's sex from looking at it? From how it behaves? No you can't, the true nature of most animals including humans is gender neutral. Sorry that's long but hope it helps you. And you don't have to have sex all the time everyone is different, I'm sure when you find the right person it will happen.