Told my husband I wanted to die and that I feel like the end is near. I wish I could say I don't want to die but that would be a lie. He asked me if I could imagine even one day of not waking up to my babies. I didn't know what to say except that I couldn't and he said there, that's what you have to live for. He's right! I wish that changed my complete apathy. I hate it. I hate me. Other than that, taking care of my kids, picking up my daughter from school and doing the dishes, I just listened to music and stared at the ceiling. My life is meaningless.