The max of Depakote I had been on a few years ago (no longer take it) was 1000mg's, and yes it can make you very tired, lose hair and gain lots of weight, way more than Lithium.
Docs still prescribe Lithium, and it still has a long track record, some docs do not want to do it cause it takes a little more of their time (my own opinion) then there are people that do not want to comply with the med., sooooooooo it is quicker for docs to get fast results, especially when a person commits themself or are committed to a hospital/psych ward.
If you are not happy with the Depakote, persue with your doc other options, and do not be afraid or intimidated to assert yourself with talking about other options, there are several other meds that can be used if one doesn't work or makes you feel worse.
I wish you lots of luck with this.
Please take care,
DE

In giving advice seek to help, not please your friend
SOLON